I had never masturbated ever. I had only heard from other girls how to do it. I was unsure how my body would respond to it.I started weighing the pros and cons of doing this, and I decided it was too risky. Masturbating for the answer to 5 questions. I looked at Aman and shook my head side to side, signaling, “No.” Aman definitely did not expect that since I was following along all the way until now.He was taken aback for a bit, but then signaled to me, “Sure?” I simply nodded. He went back to solving his aptitude test, and I started my own struggle. 5 minutes passed, and Aman whispered to me, “Pranali!” I looked at him, and he signaled me, saying he will pay me money.“WHAT?!” I thought, “Does this guy think I am a prostitute? Offering me money to touch myself and put on a show?!” I thought of complaining to the invigilator. But then kept quiet, seeing what all I had already done. With a condescending look, I signaled him, “Have you gone mad?”The shameless guy signaled back, saying,. .My mind keeps forgettinghow to breathe rightFor while others air goIn and outout and inIn a simple function of normalityMine falters a lot of the timeTurns my voice into wheezing gaspsThe dead could speak better than IMy lungs squish into a tiny boxIn the center of my chestCausing a volcanic eruption of painIt is a very similar feeling to my heartWhich thumps and clamorsAt a speed unknown to humanityThe pace of a jackrabbit heartwhose cotton little tail's on fireUntil it simply feels like itFrozen insidesBrown eyes mixed with sadEmpty heartFast mindEmotions running fastSensitive soulBlank stareDepression all aroundTear stained cheeksOnce around the block and done.No extra-time or after parties,just a head-spinning rattlefrom itching frustrationto breathless incredulityat the pace of it allSo please, by all meanssaunter, dance, crawl, or wriggleas the situation demands,although sometimes you’ll still kvetchat slow walking goons in the supermarketand want to crack the back of their.
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